ITS TIME FOR A NEW START

Today is the start of therest of my life.....

I have been playing at this dietting lark for as long as I can remember, so why should now be any different????

I have a cunning plan.....but before I tell you about that I guess I should let you in on what has got me to this point. I'll try for the condensed version.....

Its been a funny old year.... May 2008 I thought I had my life-plan sorted, I was striving towards what I thought was the most important thing in life, I was blinkered and kept working away at what I now know was a fantasy never to come to fruition well not that way anyway. I had a good job, a house and was in a long term relationship, by June 2008 I was single, uncertain about my house and struggling with my job.......I felt briefly like my world had crumbled, but then it felt like a weight had been lifted, like the scales had been removed from my eyes as it were.......

By July I was salvaging my life....sounds a little dramatic I know, but looking back thats exactly what I was doing. Sifting through what was left and what was me......I was actually looking for me. What the hell was important, everything I had spent the last few years building was no longer there....but I was finding I was smiling a lot again, I was laughing and living up to my nickname of giggles, I was seeing my friends and I was making decisions about my future again.

My friends and family were great, if constantly looking for the emotional breakdown we all felt should surely be on the horizon, but it never came. i had fun I met new people, I was enjoying my new lease of life.

Fast forward early 2009, I was trying desperatley to lose weight it seemed something I could actually take control of. I was back on the ww boards, enjoying the banter and the friendship and actually losing a bit of weight. And then I was taken by complete surprise.......whilst chatting with people on the boards something or rather someone caught my attention. Someone was talking to me, leaving me notes of encoragement, his comments were genuine and warm, they made me laugh but also the honesty within them made me think about what I was doing, what I wanted......

For the ww readers amonst you you have seen the romance unfold, that casino night on the boards the annoyingly nauseating FAO comments scattered throughout the 5+ boards and the meeting in Lincoln :o).....and 13 weeks later we are still very much together.

And here we find ourselves in June 2009...so whats changed...I am the same weight I was in May 2008, but yesterday as I stepped on the scales and noted the 1lb weight gain I did not lie to myself about not knowing where that 1lb had come from. I registered instead I had done no exercise except lifting a diet coke can to my lips, I had eaten my weight in chocolate consoling myself after hard days at work and trying to overcome the frustration at not being able to contact my American boy, and I remembered burning my low point curry and replacing it with a take away for ease.

It was a revelation..... this week I have started by acknowledging what went wrong last week so I have a fighting chance this week.......

So the plan, meetings, honesty, esource and this blog.........today is the start of the rest of my life!!!

Although these pics hold lovely memories of a glorious weekend away they can't hide the fact that I am a big lass. In my minds eye I do not look like this but I have to face teh fact this is how the world sees me. I love these pictures but can't wait until I have pictures that make me proud as well as happy :o)